Christianese!!

Inspired by recent conversations with various fellow Christians (i.e. Claudia, Nick, Jay and Sara Kavanagh and Sean), I have decided to come up with a list. This isn't an ordanary list, it's quite special. I have realized there are two things that I cannot stand: when people patronize me and when people use typical 'Christian' cliches.

In honour of the song "Christianese" by that fun, old-school band Hocus Pick here is a list of comments often heard recited by various 'Christians'. Please, if you think of anything you would like to add, post a comment or e-mail me at dj4brown@gmail.com and I will add them to the list.

Here it goes...

1 - "I want to go deeper with God" - how many of you have ever said to one of your friends "hey, I want to go deeper with you"
2 - "I want the Holy Spirit to fall" - often also heard as the 'Holy Spirit to move'
3 - "Let's just wait on the Lord" - ok, you wait, I'll go do what 'the Lord' has already told us to do
4 - "Where the Spirit of the Lord is there is freedom" - I know that's a Bible verse and I think it's very true, the problem is people often mean 'Where things are spontaneous and chaotic there is freedom' - notice the verse doesn't say where there are no structures or rules or regulations
5 - "I want a new move of God" - what happened to the old move? you know the one where Jesus came to earth and died on the cross? is that not good enough anymore? the basic message of Christianity hasn't changed in the last 2000 years, so why should it change now?
6 - "I can sense the presence of God (or the Holy Spirit)" - usually by that they mean there's some sort of mystical or magical feeling in the room, this is also known as getting warm-fuzzies, which I usually get when I'm around a girl I like
7 - "I want the new wine" - this is especially funny because it's usually Protestant churches that this is heard in and a lot of these more 'charismatic' churches strongly discourage consumption of alcohol
8 - "I just want to soak in the presense of God" - usually when human skin soaks for long enough, it gets wrinkly and turns into a prune...hmm, if 'soaking in the presense of God' is going to turn me into a prune then I'd rather 'bathe in the light of His glory'...at least that way I'll get a tan

I think I'll stop there for now but please, if you think of anything, send me an e-mail or post a comment. I know there are lots of other good 'Christian' cliches out there.

Three from Nick:
9 - "It wasn't me, it was God." - Well, no, it was you. And God.
10 - "God told me..." - I doubt it. Most of the time, in my (limited) experience, God does not explicitly tell anyone anything. Of course, the real cliche is that this is most often followed by them telling me that I should do something they want me to do.
11 - "Why don't you pray about it?" - Again, usually to try to coerce me into doing something they want me to do. The implication is "why don't you pray about it until you agree with me?" rather than "why don't you find out what God wants?".

And one from Claudia:
12 - "I'm in a relationship with God" or "God is my friend." - I think that's what we all want, but how often do we say this and really mean it? How often do we treat God like our friend? I find these phrases are used so much, and even though I loved them when I first heard them, the more I hear them, the more they loose their meaning... the more I wonder if people really think about what they're saying. I wonder too if I always think about what it means when I say these things...

Two from Amanda:
13 - "I want to go to the next level" - Well, what's the "next level" and how do you get there and WHY do you want it? And should we be spending so much time and effort trying to "get to the next level"? What's the heart of God?
14 - "I just dealing with some issues right now." - In the words of one of our pastors, "What you call 'issues,' God calls sin." Call it like it is.

"I'm learning Christianese
Religious ABC's
I'm learning Christianese
Give me a lesson please"

My Last Day at Grace

As some of you know, I have reached a milestone in my religious life...I am no longer a member of Grace Christian Fellowship. This past Sunday was my last week at Grace, a church I have gone to since it's beginning. Now with that chapter in my life over I am beginning the task of finding a new church, one that Claudia and I will both enjoy (don't get me wrong, she enjoyed Grace too).

Although I haven't attended any new churches yet, I have been thinking about what kind I would like. There's a couple different extremes. Protestant, evangelical, 'charismatic' churches (similar to Grace) are what I've always been to. While Claudia is from a much more traditional, Catholic background. But somehow, neither of these seems to fit...it's not the tradition or the lack of tradition that doesn't fit. It's something different. I suppose the only way I can describe what I'm looking for is something 'irreligious'. Whether it's traditional or not doesn't really matter, it's what's behind the tradition.

In a recent letter Claudia wrote to me, she talked about us being radical, about our quest for God taking a more radical approach. I think she meant not just fitting in to norms (in whatever type of church we go to), about being radical in our approach to God and to Christianity.

It seems to me that we're both on the same track. When Jesus came he wasn't against traditions or against non-traditions. To quote Bruxy Cavey "God doesn't hate organized religion because it's organized but because it's religion" and "the antidote to organized religion is not disorganized religion but organized irreligion."

So that's it...Irreligion - the amazing message of Jesus.